I can be a scaredy cat. Insecurity has ruled my life for many years. There are concrete reasons why these feelings get overwhelming, and a psychologist could clearly pin-point the root of the problem as my life has not been easy. I am certain that your life is not always perfect and there are things that have felt you feeling deeply insecure. For those of you that struggle with this, the terror it can leave in your mind and heart can be daunting.
Lately I have been having many conversations with God about this because I have been really fed up with being so insecure. He had lead me to the story of Gideon, which surprised me!
Gideon was just as scared to accomplish God’s will as I can be in my own Christian walk. Gideon asked God several times to “prove Himself” before going to war with the Midianites. The angel comes to tell Gideon he is a “mighty warrior”. Gideon’s response shows how he feels God has abandoned the Isrealites as they were left in the hands of the oppressive Midianites. God is blunt and tells Gideon, “…am I not sending you?” encouraging him to battle (Judges 6:14). Then Gideon asks for several signs to “make sure” it was really God speaking. He was not sure of either God or himself, he was scared of his family, the Midianites, and the men in his home town. Then God decreases his newly formed army to 300 men to blow trumpets. We know the end of the story, God’s way works, despite Gideon’s fears.
It inspires me that God already knew how skeptical Gideon would be and He chose him as the “mighty warrior”, even with all his doubts and fears. As the story progresses God instructs Gideon to go down to the Midianite camp as He is preparing His victory. He cares for Gideon’s insecurities so much that He instructs him, “…if you are afraid to attack, go down to the camp with your servant Purah…” (Judges 7:10) God still went forward with His plan.
I am now thankful in the mist of my many imperfections and insecurities that God still chose me. I am blessed that He considers these things, for as tough as I like to pretend to be, I’m still His “scaredy-cat”…and with that He can do amazing things!
(Read more about Gideon in Judges 6-8)